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TNG: The Schizoid Man - abates
Brilliant but slightly odd but very nice

Alden Bates
Date: 2006-12-17 11:59
Subject: TNG: The Schizoid Man
Security: Public
Tags:next generation
Wait, we're skipping Loud as a Whisper? Maybe Prime's playing them in production order.

The Schizoid Man: After visiting s dying man, Data begins to act strangely.

The Enterprise has been called to some outpost or other to render medical help. Meanwhile, Geordi and Troi are going to meet Data, who wants to show him the beard, he has acquired. Troi has to flee before she dies laughing.

As the Enterprise reaches the planet, they get a distress call from the USS Constantinople. They therefore execute a "near-warp" transport beaming an away team down while the ship continues on to aid the Constantinople. The away team encounters a wooden young lady who thanks them for coming. Dr Graves, played by W. Morgan Sheppard, turns up and complains loudly and hits on the women. "Women aren't people, they're women!" What?? The wooden woman, named Kareen, mistakes Worf for a Romulan, which doesn't improve things either. Of Data, Graves says "Looks like Soong's work." Given later on we find that Soong is dead ringer for Data, that's not really a huge leap...

Finally the Vulcan medical officer, Selar, announces her scans have revealed Graves has Darnay's disease, which is terminal, and everyone finally shuts the hell up.

The Enterprise has already fixed the Constantinople and is on the way back. Apparently it was a ten minute job. Probably just had a flat.

Graves discusses the nature of life and being human with Data, describing the android's life as a "sort of purgatory". Graves reveals he's worked out a way to transfer his mind into a computer before he dies and Data foolishly reveals he has an off-button.

The Enterprise reaches orbit and gets ready to beam everyone up, whereupon Data announces that Graves is dead.

Later, on the ship, Data tells Kareen that Graves thought she was very beautiful. They hold a funeral for Graves, and Data gives a long impassioned speech painting Graves as a saint, until Picard tells him to shut up again. Finally they beam the casket into space and warp off.

Later on, Picard suggests to Data that he stop trying to be human so much as it's starting to get creepy, and Data wanders off to oggle women and whistle the same tune from The Wizard of Oz which Graves had been whistling earlier. Gosh, whatever could they be trying to imply?!

Picard and Troi are a bit suspicious at Data's recent behavior. On the bridge, Data refers to Wesley as childlike, and starts making "when I was your age" speeches. Then Picard turns up with Kareen and shows her around the bridge, which causes Data to give another emotional outburst because he thinks Picard is interested in the woman. The captain takes Data aside and they run some tests which don't turn up any problems. Troi suggests it's a mental problem.

Troi makes Data take a psychological test, while Geordi suggests Data's just confused. Troi's test results suggest Data has two personalities, with one dominant personality consuming the old Data personality. We've got a crew of veritable Einsteins here.

Picard decided to question Selar on what happened on the planet. Why not ask Troi? She was there and she's standing right next to you?!

Data reveals to Kareen that he's actually Graves and she's understandably horrified. Meanwhile the rest of the crew are painfully coming to the same conclusion. After Kareen rejects Graves, he storms out of Ten Forward and Picard finds him sulking in Engineering. Picard suggests Graves leaves the body he's taken, as he's started injuring people (breaking Kareen's hand and rendering Georgi unconscious) and says Data has rights too, whereupon Grave backhands Picard across the room.

When Picard regains consciousness, they locate Data who's extremely confused as to how he got there. Kareen says Graves has transferred to the Enterprise computer, though only his knowledge has been retained. Teh End.

That was almost painful, watching them try to work out what was obvious to the viewers from about 15 minutes in....
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entertaining in a disturbing way
User: lyssie
Date: 2006-12-17 00:12 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
....I don't even remember this episode.
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Grizz: J?
User: 1_big_grizz
Date: 2006-12-17 23:22 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:J?
That was almost painful

I agree. Even for 1987, that was a terrible episode.
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