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ST:V, Alliances + Threshold - abates
Brilliant but slightly odd but very nice

Alden Bates
Date: 2004-10-02 22:07
Subject: ST:V, Alliances + Threshold
Security: Public
Alliances: After a series of Kazon attacks, Janeway has to reassess how she's been conducting business.

Woo, mid-battle. They should really do something about consoles exploding during battle. Chakotay says they've lost three crew members due to Kazon attacks.

Gratuitous reference to Spock! OK, 12 minutes in and Janeway's ready to make an alliance with the Kazon. And already someone's suggesting an alliance with Seska. Won't see be too busy being pregnant with bebbies?

This is going well so far. Neelix has been dragged off by Kazon after having gone to talk to his mate, and Janeway told Seska's pet Kazon to piss off.

Yes, when a round grenade-y looking thing rolls along the ground towards you, the first thing you should do is nudge it with your foot.

Ahh, the Trabe are the aliens the Kazon rebelled against. And Janeway wants to make an alliance with them. And then they call a conferance to make peace.

Ooops, looks like the Trabe weren't to be trusted. Janeway goes into smug mode.

Threshold: Paris, Kim and Torres experiment with transwarp to attempt to get to warp 10.

It scares me Neelix is the one to solve the last problem.

HoloDoc says there's a two percent chance Paris could suffer a brain hemorrhage if he takes the first test flight, so Janeway wants to send Kim instead. Paris talks her into letting him go anyway.

He makes it to Warp 10. Groovy. And has the dubious honour of Neelix naming a beverage after him.

HoloDoc: "It looks like he's having an allergic reaction. What did he ingest?"
Torres: "Just a cup of Neelix's coffee."
HoloDoc: "It's a miracle he's still alive."

See, that's why Tom's mutating - it's not cause he travelled at warp 10 at all. Now he's dead!

No, he got better. And now he has two hearts.

The engineer officer spying on behalf of the Kazon sends the info about the flight to them. Did someone mention Federation security protocols? Nope? Good...

Tom continues mutating. And getting paranoid and tetchy. Oh, his tongue fell out. Well, that solved that problem.

HoloDoc says they could fix Paris using anti-proton bursts, but Torres says the only place on board ship where those are generated is the Warp core. Er, what about the anti-proton weapon they attached to Chakotay's shuttle in Maneuvers?

It take them three days to find the shuttle. Wouldn't Janeway be dead from mutating? But no, she and Paris are now giant salamanders, and they have bebbies!

Yet somehow the HoloDoc manages to turn them from salamanders back into humans. That's insane. Who wrote this shite? Oh, it was Braga.
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August 2016