Alden Bates (abates) wrote,
Alden Bates
abates

ST:V, The Swarm

Wasn't this a Hitchcock movie?

The Swarm: While Voyager passes through hostile space, the HoloDoctor's program begins to degrade.

Paris and Torres sitting in a shuttle, B.O.R.R.I.N.G. Torres has cramp! Marvel! Paris tries his charm on her but is shot down. OMG! Foreshadowing! Not! Then two aliens beam aboard, shoot them both and sod right off.

Cut to HoloDoc wearing a toupee and sideburns and singing an opera in Paris' French holoprogram. Now he argues the finer points of opera with his singing partner. Joy! Then HoloDoc starts forgetting the lyrics.

Neelix says the race is bad news, and ships straying into their space sometimes turn up with the whole crew dead. Janeway says their space is too big to go around. Tuvok says it's against Star Fleet regulations, and Janeway says nyah. HoloDoc says Paris needs brane surgery, unfortuantely he can't remember how to do it. Come on, this is brain surgery, not rocket science.

*tumbleweed*

Kes helps with the brane surgery. Torres looks at HoloDoc's program and says his program is overloading and degrading. They can reinitialise the HoloDoc, but he'd be reset and lose all his progress from the last two years. Kes argues against this.

Torres discovers HoloDoc does not make for a good patient. She transfers him to a duplicate of a holodignostic station and ends up with HoloZimmerman. HoloZimmerman says HoloDoc has level 4 memory fragmentation and will end up a vegetable. Why doesn't he just run up Norton's and defrag. Sheesh.

Voyager attempts to warp through the aliens' space, but there's some drag holding the ship back.

HoloZimmerman complains that HoloDoc has been filling his personality subroutine with nonsense.

Janeway says she used to sneak out of the house when she was young, but doesn't say where she was going. Probably the library. They find a ship and beam a survivor aboard. HoloDoc is now at the intellectual level of a spud.

The swarm ships spot Voyager and begin pursuit.

Kes comes up with a plan to graft HoloZimmerman's matrix onto HoloDoc's, while Kim comes up with a technobabble solution which gets the swarm off them.

HoloDoc is repaired but appears to have forgotten everything. Except he starts singing his opera again.

Well, the middle was promising.
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