Picard says they're traveling at warp 7. That's cool. Except the Enterprise is clearly traveling at impulse! The crew of the ship they're tracking appears to be acting drunk. *peers* is that a TMP-era starship? It looks like the one from Search for Spock. Riker takes a team over... Geordi finds frosty naked people! The crew of the other ship are all dead.
Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuun!
Crusher examines the away team when they come back and finds nothing wrong, apart from Geordi acting a bit oddly. Crusher confines him to sickbay. Meanwhile, Riker and Data look up references about people taking showers while clothed. Geordi wanders out of sickbay. Yay for confinement procedures!
While security searches for him, Geordi is watching Wesley's tractor beam demo. Wesley also has samples of Picard's voice so he can play bridge officer. awwwww, that's cute! "But he still won't let me on the bridge!" Geeee, I wonder why. :)
Yar finds Geordi on the observation deck, and he asks for psychological help, then feels her face. They bundle him back to sickbay where Crusher assures Picard that no virus or anything came back from the other ship. Troi suggests that Geordi seems intoxicated.
Data and Riker are having trouble tracking down their reference. Just Google "shower clothes". Sheesh. They find the reference to a TOS episode and send the info to sickbay.
Troi finds Yar in her quarters trying on her clothes. Ships stores? Just replicate it! Gah, stop using expressions, people! You just confuse Data!
Yar wanders around the ship snogging people and chaos ensues. Wesley uses his Picard voice samples to lure the chief and assistant chief engineers away so he can take over engineering. Picard is somewhat perturbed to hear his own voice over the comm handing the ship over to Wesley.
Picard sends Data to find Yar to take her to sickbay. This leads to the legendary exchange "you are fully functional, aren't you?" "I am programmed in multiple techniques" and so forth. And then sexing ensued.
Riker reaches Engineering to find that the engines have been disabled, and Wesley's used his tractor beam to keep everyone out. Troi also turns up at Engineering and starts groping Riker until he takes her to sickbay.
Crusher tries the TOS cure on Geordi, but it doesn't work. and when Riker comes in with Troi, he infects Crusher. Picard's still trying to deal with the Wesley situation. Why don't they just beam someone into Engineering? Wesley's quite happy to learn that he's drunk. The nearby star, however, is beginning to collapse.
Riker and Chief Engineer MacDougal continue trying to get into Engineering, while Wesley locks a primitive looking tractor beam onto the other ship. Data returns to the bridge acting drunk. "If you prick me, do I not leak?" Crusher also goes up to the bridge and attempts to molest Picard.
Meanwhile, the star explodes.
Worf reports the controls are still locked, as a chunk of star hurtles towards them. MacDougal's gotten into engineering, but all the isolinear control chips have been yanked out. Riker takes Data down to engineering to put the control chips back in. This is going to take more time than it takes for the chunk of star to hit them. This allows Wesley to save the ship by turning the ship's tractor beam into a repulsor beam to buy them some more time. This involves blowing the other ship up, so I'm sure Star Fleet weren't that happy.
With the drunkenness plague cured, the Enterprise warps off. Yar tells Data "It never happened." Denied!