Alden Bates (abates) wrote,
Alden Bates
abates

TNG: Déjà Q

If I was Captain Archer, I'd be really irritated that Silik always called me by my first name. Also, if you're in a decompressing section of ship, even if you manage to seal it up and re-pressurize, wouldn't you still get the bends?

Déjà Q: The Q continuum sentence Q to live as a mortal. Comedy ensues.

OK, they're visiting some planet which is in danger from an asteroid moon with a deteriorating orbit. We spend some exposition establishing that this would be a very bad thing, because apparently it's not obvious that a huge moon hitting a planet is going to do any damage. They futilely try to tractor the asteroid for a minute or so, before a buzzing noise starts on the bridge and naked Q drops out of thin air.

After they put some clothes on Q, he complains about the Continuum kicking him out. Troi describes his emotional state as "terrified".
"What must I do to convince you people?!" "Die." "Oh, very clever, Worf. Eat any good books lately?"

Worf drags Q, complaining all the way, to the brig. Picard and Riker briefly discuss Q before going back to the moon problem. Then the ship is bathed in light, which Data says is some sort of scan. A floating light briefly appears above Q and then disappears.

Couldn't they attach thrusters to the moon?

Picard questions Q about the light, but he's preoccupied by the fact he just lost consciousness for a while, which Picard describes as "falling asleep". Q offers to share knowledge on moons, so Picard lets him out and assigns Data to accompany him. They discuss Data's drive to become human.

In engineering, Q poo poos Geordi's new plan, and suggests changing the gravitational constant of the Universe instead. Data points out that's not really possible. Q's more concerned by his new back problems, and is tended to by Crusher. Geordi comes up with a new plan to use a warp field to change the gravitational constant of the asteroid moon.

Data and Q go to Ten Forward to get food. Unfortunately for Q, this also includes an encounter with Guinen, who stabs him in the hand to prove he's human, and then announced he's a pitiful excuse for a human.

A huge cloud which appears to be a life form drifts into range and starts trying to communicate and zaps Q through the hull. Geordi's able to reconfigure the shields to block it.

Q admits he once tormented the cloud, a race called the Calamarain, and they're out for revenge. Picard is not impressed, and says they'll drop him off at the next starbase. Data tries to help Q work on his social skills. Evidently not a lot, judging by the scene which ensues in engineering.

They drop shields and project the warp field forward around the moon, and start towing, but then the Calamarain start attacking and they have to raise shields again. The attack pushes the ship towards the planet's atmosphere. Though they manage to avert the danger, the attack incapacitates Q and Data (who rushed to Q's aid).

Although Q quickly recovers, Data requires more work. Q admits he feels miserable and shameful, and that Data is a better human than he is. Then he steals a shuttle and draws the Calamarain off. The Enterprise attempts to beam the shuttle back aboard, but none of the equipment will comply. This is because another Q has appeared on board the shuttle. Q2 is played by some guy who was famous back then for being in a popular TV series, I think. Q2 gives Q his powers back.

After getting rid of the Calamarain, Q returns to the Enterprise and makes a nuisance of himself before making Data laugh and sodding off. The local aliens report that the moon's back to its normal orbit. Everyone shrugs and sets course.

That wasn't as comedic as I expected, but still good. :)
Tags: next generation
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