Aw, didn't we already have a Ferengi-based episode this season?
Sisko is cooking in celebration at something. Jake said the freighter captain, Kasidy Yates, who he's trying to set his dad up with, is on the station. Meanwhile, in Quarks, Quark and Rom argue over whether Nog should join Star Fleet or it'll destroy the Ferengi way of life. Then Brunt, from the Ferengi Commerce Authority, presents Quark with a writ of accountability, and Rom closes the bar. Brunt reveals that Quark's being charged with improper supervision of a family member - their mother has been earning profit.
In ops, Sisko names a new Runabout, and Dax asks Sisko if he's seen Kasidy yet.
Rom nags Quark into letting him come back to Ferenginar, where it's revealed that the Ferengi totally ripped off Hobbit architecture. Brunt says Quark has 3 days to get an admission of guilt out of their mother, who at that point makes an appearance and says she's not confessing anything. Also, she's wearing clothing, much to Brunt's distress. He storms out after she talks to him.
On DS9, O'Brien and Bashir are trying to break into Quark's bar (under Odo's supervision) to get their dart board back. Sisko stops by and observes it'll take them a while to get through the locking mechanism, and they ask if he's going to talk to the freighter captain. News travels fast on DS9. Maybe a little too fast...
Quark laments how liberated his mother is. She doesn't even pre-chew their food for them. Over dinner, it's revealed that she invested some of her pocket money in a beetle farm and earned three strips of gold-pressed latinum. Quark points out that if she doesn't sign the confession, she will be sold into indentured servitude, and worse - Quark will have to pay back the three bars!
Then there's a scene in their mother's bedroom, during which she disrobes to make Rom more comfortable. This is frankly disturbing. Rom asks her to do the right thing, but she's committed to the episode's clumsy women's lib allegory, and instead offers to sharpen his teeth for him.
On DS9, Sisko talks to Kasidy finally, and they arrange to have coffee together.
Quark has discovered that their mother's been earning quite a lot more than three bars of gold-pressed latinum. More than Quark's amassed wealth, in fact. Quark is very depressed, but says he's come up with a plan. He's going to kill her. He catches her trying to conceal more profits, and she points out she's a better Ferengi than Quark is and challenges him as to why women aren't allowed to conduct business. He storms out, announcing he's going to the FCA. Rom says that their father was actually a crap businessman, which leads into him and Quark having a brawl, which their mother has to break up.
Quark arrives at the FCA to tell them about his mother's financial empire, and Rom arrives shortly after to tell Quark that their mother's offered to share her profits with him 50/50. Suddenly feeling richer, Quark decides discretion is the better part of profit-making.
Back home, Quark apologises, and the pair discover that Rom lied to Quark about the 50/50 split, but their outrage is shortlived, as Rom takes charge of the situation and tells them to sort it the hell out. After a heartfelt family conversation later, she agrees to give the profit back and sign the confession.
Sisko and Kasidy have coffee. And it turns out the colony where her brother works is playing baseball. Sisko becomes entirely too excited and they go to listen to the commentary from the last game.
Quark's mother signs the confession, and Quark bribes Brunt into keeping it all quiet. Rom and their mother discuss how she actually only gave up a third of her amassed fortune to the FCA - the rest being cleverly hidden.
Woo! Doctor Who Series 4 trailer! No clips beyond The Unicorn and the Wasp, I notice...